Disclaimer: All that is written here is purely nonsense, so please, for your safety and mine, do not try this.
- Pretend to be deaf. And if the other person decides to ‘write’ it for you, you can just say (or write back) that their hand writing is so ugly, you can’t understand a word. Or you are suffering from lack of Vitamin D and have really brittle bones and cannot pick a pencil or pen( or crayons) properly. Because if you do, you might break a bone.
- - Just nod and smile. And if they get their clever pants on and ask you a question just to check if you were actually listening to them, say something like ‘ Uh, yeah sure’ or ‘You’re absolutely right!’ . People generally like it when other people agree with them. And if you’re in one of those situations where you know that saying ‘sure’ or ‘right’ might get you into some trouble, just flip your hair and laugh. And then run away.
- - Sneeze. 8 times in a row, I’m not even sure if this is humanly possible, but just fake it and start sneezing as if somebody dumped you, head-on in a bucket full of black pepper. After this, excuse yourself and get away.
- - Faint. Works like a charm.
- - In order to make the other person quiet, start crying. Sure enough, they’ll ask you the reason and from there onwards it’s all about you and your problems.
- While in conversation, if you don’t feel like paying attention because the other person is talking about Astrophysics, you can zone out, they’ll say ‘ You seem distracted’ you say ‘ That’s because I am’. Elaborate this with things like ‘ It’s just work’ or ‘It’s just my paranoid bf/gf’ or ‘It’s just my exams’or 'It's just recession' .